Won't Give Up

I am really proud of myself for never giving up. Even before I started blogging I was trying to lose weight. I'd get off 30 or 35 pounds and then gain it back PLUS some. And then when I started this blog, at 278 pounds, I thought that would be the final time I'd ever have to lose weight. When I got down to 214 pounds that first year, I was SURE I would never regain any of that weight and would keep working hard and keep losing. Imagine how shocked I was to be back up to 245 pounds only a little over a year later.

But still, I did not regain it all. For the first time in my life, I didn't gain it all back and then add more pounds. And that's because I didn't give up. I got back down to 234 pounds before I started Medifast two and a half years after I started this blog. And I stuck with that and lost almost 60 pounds in 8 months. And I *knew* I was never going back. I would never regain any of those hard lost pounds.

Except I did. I worked hard to stay in the 170's and 180's for 8 months, but losing more eluded me. I even got into the 190's for 2 months before getting back down to 184. But by the end of 2011, I was back over 200 pounds, and let me tell you, that sucked. It sucked that I worked so hard to lose in the first place, and it sucked that I felt powerless to keep on losing weight or even to keep off what I had lost.

Bur I never gave up. For all of 2012 and 2013 I worked to stay under 220, and succeeded in only hitting a high of 221 once. Yet at the very end of 2013, I broke into the 220's, hit 226... and never got below that again... until this month, when I got to 225. Almost four years at 226+... up to and including 260 pounds. And yet, even at 260, I did not give up. I kept fighting. And I am still fighting, and I will never give up.

Some may see this as a story of failure, an exercise in futility, an obese woman spending over a decade trying to lose the weight but never getting there. Still fat, still on a diet. But some will see the story of success. The determination to reach that goal even if it takes a decade, trying different things, working not to regain it all... and *succeeding* at that. That's how I see it. Success.

I won't ever give up or stop trying. Never.








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